I'm
Against It.
 The
official GOP handbook says, in Chapter One, page
one: "If the negro
in the White House wants it, we are against it."
Actually, the handbook is just a
one-page flier that Speaker of the House John Boehner
distributes each morning to all his
Republican brethren while also doling out campaign
checks from the tobacco industry. Besides the
single, all-important rule it also features a Sudoku
puzzle, the latest Jumble, and
an inspirational
mad-lib from David Koch to keep the members busy
while they wait for their
concubines to arrive with their daily ration of
meth-infused nipple cream.
Even
if what the President wants means cleaner air,
greater prosperity for all, or free kittens for
vets then just forget about it. Automatic Conservative
gainsaying has gotten so bad in Congress
the past four years that the Prez almost couldn't
lose by stumping for policies
he's ordinarily against. Who knows? The assembled
GOP might become so repulsed at the idea of voting
for free machine guns for babies, legislation that
was introduced by an icky old black person, that
they might
just say "Screw it!" and proceed to pry that gun
out of Charlton Heston's hands and chunk it in
the river.
Yeah, I know. It sounds stupid but it's no dumber
than the way Washington, D.C. works now.
=Lefty=
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