May 2008

Get to know the REAL John McCain. And share, won't you?

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lil hothead McCain

Not only does John McCain own eight twelve+ houses scattered around the country, he also has a personal jet to fly him around for campaigning. It actually belongs to a company run by his wife, a woman worth $100 million dollars. But that's not elitist in the least, is it?

McCain with bulletproof vest.

McCain talks a lot about taking on special interests, but his campaign manager and top advisers are actually lobbyists (for oil, banking and pharmaceutical companies). The government watchdog group Public Citizen says McCain has 59 lobbyists raising money for his campaign, more than any of the other presidential candidates.

Siamese morons

If McCain's proposed health plan had been in effect all along, he would not have been allowed treatment for the cancer of which he was later cured. Thank goodness he had all that governent-supplied health care.

Please note: Not one day in John McCain's life has he not been under the attentive auspices of the finest in government-funded health care. This stems from having been born to an admiral of the US Navy, then joining the military, then becoming a US congressman, then senator. Must be nice.

McCain & Kerry

Senator McCain denied ever talking with John Kerry about his leaving the GOP to be John Kerry's running mate back in 2004 -- then later admitting he had, insisting: "Everybody knows that I had a conversation."

McCain's sharp eBay hat.

One of his answers to the country's economic woes is (are you ready?) eBay. As he told a crowd in Kentucky: “Today, for example,” McCain said, “1.3 million people in the world make a living off eBay, most of those are in the United States of America.”

So would it surprise you to know his national campaign co-chair, Meg Whitman, is a former eBay CEO?

McCain war paint

Cindy Giuliani

John Kerry's wife, Theresa Heinz Kerry, released her tax records during the 2004 presidential campaign, but beer heiress and ex-drug addict Cindy McCain has stated that she will not make hers public.

It may seem at first like this is nobody's business but the McCain family, except for the fact that all of John's assets are in Cindy's name. You see, it's vital to know where a presidential candidates money is invested in order to keep track of conflicts of interest. After all, this isn't the vice-president we're talking about here.

As the police often say "Only the guilty hide."

One other thought... if John McCain hadn't been married to a woman worth over $100 million dollars he would not have made it this far. He's not the Republican candidate because of merit, he's the candidate because he has a very rich wife.

Oy! Such a headache I got.

Two of John Mccain's top aides, Douglas Goodyear and Doug Davenport, have been forced to resign due to revelations resulting from the monster typhoon that killed 100,000 people in Burma.

Thanks to this disaster the American people have discovered what a truly murderous gaggle of goons comprise the Burmese government. We subsequently learned that Goodyear and Davenport had been hired by the Burmese government to help improve their image... at the bargain-basement price of $400,000. Each.

By comparison, consider Hitler hiring Goodyear and Davenport to make him appear sweet and lovable and you get the idea.

This begs the question: What are the other 112 lobbyists associated with the McCain campaign up to?

Show me de moneez!

John McCain's wife, Cindy, is keeping all the family finances in her name. The National Review had this to say about that:

"Trusts and income this large, even if only partly controlled by a potential future First Lady, matter. We've already seen how (she) effectively helped finance her husband's campaign, at least in its bleaker moments."

Oh, wait... that's what the National Review wrote about Theresa Heinz Kerry back in 2003.

Choice words to eat.

Show me the money!

Uncle Fester
John McCain is a grown man, but he is superstitious to a degree that bespeaks neurosis.

For instance, he follows the old and bizarre custom of never tossing his hat on a bed, lest someone die.

Ooooh-kay. But who wears hats these days?

He also carries around with him a lucky feather, a lucky compass, a lucky penny, a lucky nickel, and a lucky quarter. He probably also has lucky rocketship underpants but he is evidently cagey enough to keep juicy tidbits clear of fourth estate reportage.

carrot for prez

The advertising strategist for John McCain, Mark McKinnon, quit the McCain campaign today because (are you ready?) he supports Barack Obama. This is the same guy who worked for no pay back during the dark days of McCain's current presidential bid.

To be fair he informed Senator McCain about this decision some months ago, but still...

For once, I'm actually proud of Mr. McCain's choice of   employees. Very proud.


The most an individual can give to a campaign is $2300... unless you're a Republican, then you can give $70,000.


McCain has changed the rules in mid-stream and now all monies donated to the McCain campaign will now go into RNC coffers, where it will then be used, without doubt, to inundate the media with ads featuring Barack Obama playing strip Twister with Osama bin Laden.

McCain is plainly saying he will happily root in the mud of corporate donations and I am sure he will faithfully serve his corporate masters. You, on the other hand, can take your pathetic little $2300 and go buy a few tanks of gas.

Senator Obama raised $41 million in March from individuals like you and me as he does not accept lobbyist or PAC money.


Tanned. Rested. Ready.

The Melanoma Man

Finally, finally, finally Senator McCain opened his voluminous medical files to the press... to only a select handful of reporters... none of whom were allowed to make copies... for three whole hours... on the Friday before Memorial Day.

That's 12,000 pages of medical records.

This steaming load of political chicanery allows McCain to claim he opened his records (Peek-a-Boo!) to the press, even though he really hasn't.

The Straight Talk Express rolls on.

The American face of war.

Foreclosure filings in 10 towns and cities within 10 miles of military facilities, including Norfolk, Virginia, home of the Navy’s largest base, rose by an average 217 percent from January through April from a year earlier. Nationally, the rate was 59 percent in the same period, according to RealtyTrac, which tallies bank seizures, auctions and default notices.

The biggest surge was in Columbia, South Carolina, home to Fort Jackson, where the Army trains recruits for combat in Afghanistan and Iraq. Properties in some stage of foreclosure rose 492 percent from a year earlier, RealtyTrac said. The second-biggest increase was 414 percent in Woodbridge, Virginia, next to the Marine Corps Base Quantico.

This war is killing military families, driving them into bankruptcy and worse.

And McCain has no plans to leave Iraq.

Fuck him.

shoot yourself

John McCain and Phil Gramm

Until very recently, former Texas Senator Phil Gramm was a lobbyist for the very same Swiss banks that were deep in debt due to the recent mortage crisis. At the same time he was a campaign manager for Senator John McCain and was, in fact, the one writing McCain's economic policies, including the ones that said the mortgage crisis was the fault of the consumer, not the lenders.

Oy, vey!

It's no secret Gramm is stumping to be McCain's Treasury Secretary. There's good news.

Does McCain know ANYBODY except lobbyists working for the corporate equivalent of Satan?

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