The
Mind of Derek Chauvin
It's
scary to try and
delve into the mind
of a psychopath but
I thought I give
it a try. Some of
the other semi-lucid
thoughts I imagined
caroming around Chauvin's brain
as he murdered George
Floyd were:
Whoa. Is that mustard?
I really need to
train an army of
flying
monkeys.
Ladle. Ladle. Ladle.
You know, ladle is
a funny word if you
say it
enough times.
I wonder if Santa
is fat because he
eats children?
I'll probably get
promoted for this.
-----------
Since my last cartoon:
Bunker Boy got all
butt-hurt because
he'd been
reported to have
been hiding in the
White House
bunker
during the racial
protests.
So he called his
imaginary pal, the
fascist leader of
Russia, presumably
for advice.
Shortly after that
he decided that a
propaganda photo-op
in front of a church
across the street
from the White House
would solve everything.
So he called in the
military police and
had them assault
a peaceful crowd
of
protestors
with tear-gas and
rubber bullets so
that they wouldn't
sully
his
perfect
moment.
Included in this
crowd were the priests
of the church t-Rump
would later use as
a back-drop.
Oopsies.
He didn't ask permission
to use the church
as a prop and didn't
recite from scripture.
After all, why would
he?
He held up a Bible
upside-down and backwards
for the cameras presumably
to prove that he
IS the Anti-Christ.
Later when asked
if
it
was his
Bible t-rump responded "It's
a Bible." Stable
genius, that guy.
If you saw the photos
it was hard to not
notice that he held
that Bible like it
was
on fire. Or like
he was a nun holding
a dildo.
Then he threatened
to order martial
law.
t-Rump needs to resign
before (more) people
are killed.
-----------
If a white fascist
masquerades as a
protestor and incites
violence it will
result in the entire
crowd of protesters
being called terrorists.
If a white fascist
masquerades as a
cop and incites violence
no one will be able
to tell the difference.
-----------
Thousands of Americans
recently showed up
at the door of the
White
House,
enraged by the racist
policies of this
administration.
t-Rump's response: "Release
the hounds! And where's
the button that opens
a trap door under
the feet of my enemies?
What? There isn't
one? Thanks, Obama!
Okay, then. Break
out the ominous weapons!"
He actually tweeted "ominous
weapons." Now
what would be an
ominous weapon to
Dotard J. t-Rump?
A salad?
A mail-in ballot?
A cabinet member
that says "No"?
A flight of stairs
with no handrail?
Facts?
Peer-reviewed science?
A thesaurus?
A child psychiatrist?
------------
And, finally, a Twitter-user
created an account
in which he copied
exactly all of Bunker
Boy's tweets. Twelve
hours later Twitter
shut him down for
violating its standards.
Thanks, Twitter.
=Lefty=
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