Story
Time
Not
so very long
ago there once was
a country where
the
people lived in relative
peace and happiness,
until the tigers
appeared and began
eating them.
So the People asked
their leader: "Oh,
Great One! Where
are the Soldiers
we trained to stop
the tigers?"
And the Great One
answered: "We
did not need them
as there are no tigers.
I instead sent our
Soldiers to go and
build a
great wall around
our land."
And the People said: "But
the tigers have easily
leapt over that wall.
What can we do to
protect ourselves?"
And the Great One
said: "We need
do nothing, as these
tigers have no teeth."
And the People wailed: "But
many of our people
are dying from tiger
attack. We can see
their sharp teeth
as they glint in
the sun. And the
Shamans who try to
save those who have
been attacked by
tigers are being
eaten, too."
And the Shamans said: "We
can create a poison
that will kill the
tigers but it will
take many months.
Until then the only
defense we have is
to hide in our caves
until they starve
or abandon our land."
And the Great One
said: "You Shamans
will not make me
look like a fool.
The people can do
whatever they like.
Whatever happens
is not my fault."
And the Leader's
Acolytes said: "Those
shamans are not to
be trusted! If our
leader does not believe
in tigers then neither
shall we. We shall
open our doors wide
and welcome the sun.
And we will open
the doors of other
caves because we
are not afraid of… URK!"
And the People cried: "Oh,
Great One! Your acolytes
are keeping the tigers
alive through their
foolishness and our
larders are going
bare. And we are
dying in great numbers
as we search for
food. And there are
those who are stripping
the gardens of their
leaves in order to
keep their behinds
clean. And there
are also those who
sit and sharpen their
knives, for they
sadly anticipate
a time when there
is not enough food
for all."
And the Scribes said: "Oh,
Great One. We have
been told by your
attendants that you
commanded that our
best tiger traps
be sent to other
villages, even as
we had tigers in
our midst. And that
your children profited
greatly from the
sale. What say you
to that?"
And the Great One
said: "You are
fake Scribes."
And the People said: "None
of us are safe until
all of us are safe.
You must command
that all the people
barricade themselves
indoors until the
beasts are gone."
And the Great One
said: "No! You
must continue to
toil in the field.
I am the best leader
ever and my reign
must be unmarred
by your sorrow."
And the People said: "How
then can we be protected?"
And the Great one
said: "Look!
I have a magic elixir!"
And the People said: "Does
it work?"
And an Acolyte said. "I
will drink of it!"
And the Acolyte did.
And the Acolyte died.
And the People said: "Booooo!
You must leave! We
need a leader who
is capable and has
keen foresight. If
you do not abdicate
we will force you
out."
And the Great Leader
said: "How will
you do that? If you
gather in large groups
out in the open the
tigers will eat you.
Besides, my Sheriff
makes the rules and
my Guards defend
my palace and my
Courts make law of
my every whim. "
Normally, about now,
in a story such as
this, you might expect
a twist ending but,
no. In this completely
fictional story the
Leader just sat in
his palace
and tweeted like
the birds. And the
number of the People
attacked by tigers
continued to rise,
and the number of
the People killed
and eaten by tigers
continued to grow
and grow until, at
last, the Shamans
developed a poison
that killed all the
tigers.
If it makes you feel
better you can pretend
that the Leader was
eaten by a tiger.
Really slowly and
painfully. Starting
at the feet and working
its way up until
it reached the heart,
whereupon then it
looked into the eyes
of Leader and then
bit down, hard.
How's
that
work for
ya?
-------------
The three scariest
words I've heard
in quite a while
came
from Dr. Chris Martinson,
who has
worked extensively
with Covid-19. Those
three words were:
"Plant a garden."
He foresees severe
food shortages in
our future, and I,
for one, can understand
why. It's called "Mad Trump
disease".
=Lefty=
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