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Rhymes With Orange
Randi Rhodes

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I am not an atheist

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It's Only Words

snidely whiplashThe word "atheist" is personally vexing
because it essentially means that I don't believe in your particular imaginary friend. It arbitrarily makes me the enemy, not unlike Snidely Whiplash, though I can't remember the last time I tied anyone to the railroad tracks.

And, as though including me as a villainous bit player in these vaudevillian productions isn't bad enough, nowadays my secular pals are trying to convince anyone who'll listen that atheism is itself a religion.

Actually that would be pretty cool. I could use a nice tax-free gig, but even the gummint knows that no one can make a dime preaching nothing about no one to an empty room. So good luck getting the permit, Pastor.

So what I need to do is invent a new religion, one based on the life of an all-powerful being. He could control space and time, even decide the fate of entire worlds, yet know when each of us are in trouble and would instantly answer our cries for help. And even though he may die, he shall yet be resurrected.

I shall call it "The First Church of Superman". And it will be good.



Republican Job Creation Update

john boehner"We're going to have a relentless focus on creating jobs." - John Boehner, February 10, 2011.

The following is #86 in a list of Republican job creation activities since they gained control of the House in 2011. None, sad to say, have yet to result in one, single new job.

(86) 9-19-2011: Republican Majority Leader Eric Cantor is back with a pithy statement about Mr. Obama's jobs bill: "While an all or nothing approach might make sense to some communicators, I hope the President realizes it would be better to work together." This from a man whose job it is to say "No" to anything the president proposes. I hope he gets a painful boil on his uvula.

NOTE: As a result of an unexpected wave of enthusiasm the Republican Job Creation update now has its own web site. It will remain on the RP but a web site of its own will raise its visibility on the 'net as we progress towards the critical 2012 elections. And I thank you for your support.


Dump Fox News

Fox News Lies!And what manner of lie is Fox News spewing today? What they're trying to sell its audience is that "every man for himself" is the true American dream. What annoying assholes.

Click here to help Drop Fox from your cable system.

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Today's Google Chow.

I do not believe in Santa. I am not an asantaist.

I do not believe in the Tooth Fairy. I am not an afairyist.

I do not believe in the Easter Bunny. I am not an abunnyist.

I don't not believe in God. I am not an atheist.