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Raging Pencils Comic
Your win is everyone's loss.

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start rant

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swearing apI have any number of choice words I'd like to share with you today, common Anglo-Saxonism's you're probably all too familiar with, but nothing I can say here could possibly cut through the dense, obsidian-like shell that gently cradles the microscopic shred of neural material that passes for the neocortex of anyone who voted Republican today, so instead I'll just bash my head against this convenient table edge for a few minutes.

(Sound of a side of bacon being struck repeatedly with a Louisville Slugger.)

Ah! That was refreshing. Now where was I? Oh, yes! Catharsis!

Right after the 2002 mid-terms, when
Republicans took both the House and Senate, I had a friend email me, crowing triumphantly that "Now we'll get things done."

As I recall, all that "got done" was world economic collapse and a brutal withering of the Bill of Rights.

Today's election result is a sad moment in American politics but I comfort myself with the knowledge that the new Republican-led House will be unable to kill the Health Care bill or privatize Social Security, two things they'd give the left nut of their Mexican gardener to do. However, Conservatives now control the powerful House committees and they'll immediately begin cutting funds for any program tainted with even a sniff of progressive funk. Education, child care and contraception will probably be first to face the chopping blocks. Just guessing, though.

And any bets on when the first Articles of Impeachment hits the fan? Oh, yes. It's coming. How dare Mr. Obama, uh, not bring change! Burn him! Burrrrrn!

So thanks a lot, you loathesome Republican retards. Thanks for dooming the American economy to stone cold stasis for the next two years. As far as our new Congressman are concerned job growth is not important when there's a mulatto to lynch.

All that's left is to say see you in two years. If there's anything left. In the meantime I'll be here, just a-drawing away. My guess is there'll be no end of Republican bufoonery to lampoon so at least I'll be able to keep myself occupied as the fires go slowly out.


end rant

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Mr. Elephant: "See? I fixed it.
Now you don't have to worry about
me driving it into a ditch no more.
Our worries are over."