raging pencils logo
Free progressive comics every Monday, Wednesday & Friday!
coronavirus comic
newest Raging Pencils comic
 Raging Pencils comic archive The Reapers comic
The Raging Pencils archive Raging Pencils RSS feed Support progressive comics Contact Lefty
The progressive web comic about how Republicans routinely kill civilians.




start rant

Murder Inc.

Why is it EVERY FUCKING TIME a Republican plants his butt behind the Resolute Desk civilians have to start dying by the thousands?

"What? Planes crashing into buildings? We'd have never guessed."

"What? The levees have flooded in New Orleans? Guess I'll go to a birthday party."

"What? Nuns being kicked out of helicopters over the ocean? Here, Iran, have some missiles."

What? Gay people dying? Trees cause pollution, you know."

"What? Germs from China will destory our whole economy? Time for another rally and a round of golf. "

"What? Iraq invaded Kuwait after I gave them permission? Who'd a-thunk?"

"What? A devastaing hurricane in Puerto r-r-r-Rico? Have some paper towels."

STOP. VOTING. FOR. THESE. PEOPLE!

Mail-in voting NOW!

----------------

If we're wise we should all operate on the idea that getting infected with COVID-19 is going to be a "when", not an "if". So let's do EVERYTHING we can to be a "when" much later on in the year when hospital's much less resemble Thunderdome.

This message brought to you by Americans Who Just Can't Shut Up About the Patently Obvious.

---------------

Moscow Mitch McConnell is now saying that Dumbass Donald missed this whole coronavirus thing because he was (Sob-whimper-whine-moan) distracted by that whole impeachment thing.

Okay, let's see. What was Chubby Hitler doing between September, 2019 and February 5, 2020?

Signing legislation? ...... Nope.

Reading to school children?..... Nope

Preparing for a pandemic?..... Nope.

Ah! Here it is!

Nineteen political rallies. (Possibly more.) Almost a full three weeks on the road masturbating furiously for the benefit of Fox News in front of crowds partially composed of paid actors assembled via Craigslist ads.

During this whole period the Oaf of Office slept like an Adderall-addicted baby because he knew the Senate would not vote to convict. If t-Rump was distracted by anything at that time it could only have been the infected paper cuts on his asshole from wiping his sphincter with the Constitution.

---------------

t-Rump, on Fox: "The things [House Democrats] had in [the Stimulus Bill] were crazy. They had levels of voting, that if you ever agreed to it you'd never have a Republican elected in this country again."

What Minipinkies McGropeypants is whining about is that the Democrats know the coronavirus will be roaring back in November and it would be a great idea if people could vote by mail.

Like, everyone.

And if everyone votes, Democrats win and win big. Republicans only win by suppressing votes. It's on Page Two of their user guides. Page One instructs them to conspire with a foreign government.

-------------

Dumbass Donald now wants an infrastructure bill in the middle of a pandemic.

Le sigh.

Yeah, all those unemployed waitresses and nail stylists are just going to jump at the chance to run a backhoe and pour concrete for $7.25 an hour in a poisoned wasteland courtesy of a DOJ-castrated EPA.

How long before Hair Furor goes full Pol Pot and starts executing anyone with a New York Times subscription and sending everyone else into the farm belt to harvest avocados and Big Macs?

-------------

If just a month ago our government (Snort!) had said "Everyone off the streets for two weeks. No exceptions. Then this pandemic will be over. We promise. While you're in quarantine we'll be manufacturing new tests to make sure it doesn't spread again."

But, no. We got Shit for Brains in the White House patting himself on the back with his tiny, little, doll-like hands for keeping the death toll at only 100,000.

Or is it 240,000?

Or is it 2 million?

=Lefty=
 
end rant






News & Notes for April 1, 2020

Why are members of Congress allowed to play the stock market?

The U.S. spends an obscenely massive shit-load of money each year on nuclear weapons.

60% of Americans will be unable to meet their financial needs under a one-month quarantine.

Fact-checking Trump's attempt to erase his failed coronavirus response.

White House economists tried to warn Trump that 500,000 would die and $4 trillion would be lost.



Raging Commercialism
Raging Pencils t-shirts
Buy someone you barely tolerate a beautiful, 100% cotton
Raging Pencils t-shirt from the RP Spreadshirt store.


(Comments are moderated for misinformation, not content.)

Comments

[login] 
Not using Html Comment Box  yet?
Leila

@David:

“At this point folks if you still believe in Sky Daddy you are amongst the millions (billions) supposedly sane and decent folk who believe what only a lunatic (like Trump, et al) could believe on their own.”

There’s no proof Trump believes in God or takes religion seriously, and lots of proof he doesn’t know anything and doesn’t care to. It’s another aspect of his con job.

There are still many many decent people who believe in a Deity. I’ve always been an agnostic, but I actually wish I could have a faith. I try to. It’s tough when the most famous “religious” people in our nation are hypocrites and actual swindlers. Then there are the ones who try to show off that their Buddy, God, will rescue them when they do some thing risky, like handle snakes, not be vaccinated, ignore health warnings, etc. In Matthew 4:7, the story goes that the Devil tells Jesus to throw himself off a building so God will catch Him. "Jesus answered him, "It is also written: Do not put the Lord your God to the Test." So, Christians shouldn’t be doing this stuff.

As an antidote to these poisonous people, here’s something that’s making the rounds on the Internet. People trying to be a good religious person should be trying more to be like this guy, the first Protestant:

Martin Luther on the Bubonic Plague:
“I shall ask God mercifully to protect us. Then I shall fumigate, help purify the air, administer medicine, and take it. I shall avoid places and persons where my presence is not needed in order not to become contaminated and thus perchance infect and pollute others, and so cause their death as a result of my negligence. If God should wish to take me, he will surely find me and I have done what he has expected of me and so I am not responsible for either my own death or the death of others.”
Martin Luther, "Luther's Works, Vol. 43: Devotional Writings II”

David

Cicely, I actually promote the idea of banning all golf courses forever. tRump has now made that a higher priority.

cicely

And the golfing.

Don't forget all the golfing we paid for him to do.

Dancer

SADLY...BRILLIANT AS EVER!!!

David

Did anyone see where the arrested pastor in Louisiana, for holding church services during a ban, is now being represented by Judge Roy Moore?

At this point folks if you still believe in Sky Daddy you are amongst the millions (billions) supposedly sane and decent folk who believe what only a lunatic (like Trump, et al) could believe on their own.

No wonder a rapethuglicans (like that word :)) idiot like Reagan closed the insane asylums they might have locked him and members of congress up in them.

David

I think we need much reform in the US Elections. For example we should have:
Term Limits, no exceptions
No Congressional Retirement Packages
No Congressional Medical Care
Cannot Become a Lobbyist
Cannot work for any Fortune 500 Co.

We also must have:
No Gerrymandering
Mandatory Background Checks
Show Every Tax Return you Filed
Pass a Mental Health Check with a Professional Psychologist
Pass the US Citizenship Test with a 100% out of 500 questions

Kharkov

215,000 coronavirus cases as of April 2nd, up 110,000 in 6 days. The president thinks it’s ‘success’ if there’s less than 100,000 deaths. The individual states are competing with other AND the federal government for gear/equipment/supplies. There’s at least 15 days of increases coming.
And Trump is STILL listened to? Still in charge? Still supported?
Democracy doesn’t die to the sound of thunderous applause but it just may drown in stupidity...

Anonymous

Yo, fuck these rapethuglicans. From allowing Dolt 45 to walk on impeachment to his non-handling of this National crisis we need a new response.

Vote every one of these ass hats out and start over.

Capitalism can only coexist with Democracy for so long before American Oligarcs are allowedto wipe their collective asses with our Constitution.

eddi

Apparently the press is cutting him off from his daily blather about everything but when America will finally get a real pandemic response program in place.


Classic Raging Crappola
quisling comic
The Quisling King.




-------------------------------------------

If you enjoy Raging Pencils, might I also recommend:
the infinite cat project


••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
Need more progressive news? Lefty recommends:
Dailykos • Crooks and Liars • Randi Rhodes
••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Google Chow (Eat hearty, little Google-bots!)
Reagan: My policies led to 300000 civilians dying in Central America.
George H.W. Bush: My policies led to 300000 civilians dying in Iraq.
George W. Bush: My policies led to 500000 civilians dying in the Middle East.
Trump: Hold my beer. Coronavirus COVID-19




coronavirus comic grim reaper comic