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The progressive web comic about guns in Heaven.




start rant

Miss Me?

Here's a question for all you good, god-fearin' members of the NRA:

Do you believe that there are guns in Heaven?

Unless you good folks believe that Heaven is actually a cloud-based reproduction of your current corporeal existence, complete with iPhones, toaster ovens, and butt-plugs, I'm pretty sure you've never envisaged assault weapons as part of the Eternal Plan.

So if the policy of "no guns" is good enough for God, shouldn't it be good enough for us down here on Earth, too?

----------

I missed creating a cartoon a couple of days last week but I had a really good reason.

Once the third presidential debate had ended, after Mrs. Clinton scorched Trump like a Samsung cell phone, after she sunk him like a spun-sugar dinghy, after she nailed him like a composition roof, after she broke him like a bad tooth, after she burned him like General Sherman, after she flattened him like a Kansas horizon, after she blasted him like a Saturn V orgasm, after she cooked him like a turducken flambe', after she buried him like an Atari 2600 ET game cartridge, after she bruised him like a hemophiliac banana, after she hosed him like Ron Jeremy under a full moon, after she spiked him like an Enron electric bill, after she hammered him like one of the Three Stooges a sense of calm washed over me.

"It's over. It's done. The orange, entitled, perverse, illiterate fuckwaffle is through. I have no need to ever care about anything he says or does again."

A Democratic president was now inevitable, along with a Democratic Senate. Who could blame me for taking a breather while we await the celebrations no doubt to occur late in the evening of November 8th.

=Lefty=

end rant




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(Comments are moderated for misinformation, not content.)

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Vizzy

Okay, I gotta call this one out -- if there are no 'butt plugs' in heaven...how is it heaven?

Butt plugs aside (just for the moment), your comment about heaven being a copy of this life reminded me of an ethnography I read. Basically, these island people saw the after life as a continuation of this life. You live in a small hut, you have yam garden, you fish for food. It NEVER ends.

So sure, why not think "heaven" is just a continuation of this life? Unless of course you've come to your senses and realize, this is it, so make the best of it.

Okay...and now back to our regularly scheduled butt plugs...

eddi

@Patrick S
The Rebs have plenty of October surprises. Just about every time their candidate opens his mouth, they get another one.

Patrick S

What! The R's don't have an October surprise up their sleeve? I hope you are right,... er, I mean correct Lefty!

eddi

Regarding the Classic Raging Crappola.
i thought the Gerrymander was the official Reb mascot. 5 of them twist themselves into the shape of an elephant.

morpher

That was supposed to be "get OUT and vote!" (correcting "lout" -- all the louts will vote for Trump).

morpher

Keep those votes rolling in -- remember us poor Australians. When America catches cold, we get pneumonia! Don't count your chickens, etc. Get lout and vote!!! Lefty -- delightful cartoon, hits the spot with a certain subtlety (I hope you were aiming for subtlety, LOL). Now the rant -- do I get the impression you think Trump might be a less than worthy character? I am intrigued about you stopping at "Stooges" -- I thought you were just getting into your stride! Incidentally, I would have put in a comma after Stooges. And yes, never underestimate the ability if Republicans to steal -- anything. But most importantly, elections. They own the voting machines and have fought tooth and nail to avoid providing a paper trail. Shits.

Lefty (mod)

Edward, I think you mean "Never underestimate the ability of a Republican to steal an election."

SaltWaterCroc

It's way too early to celebrate. However, record turnouts in Houston and Dallas for early voting is a good sign. Encourage everyone to vote - that is the message to hammer on the next few weeks.

Edward

"Never underestimate the ability of a Democrat to screw up an election." - Me

eddi

p.s. I have voted. Straight Dem, again.

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A man carrying a rifle stands before the Pearly Gates. A sign says: No guns allowed.
No guns? I'd rather go to Hell!
Saint Peter: Suit yourself.
Satan: Hey! We got another one.