"Sometimes the press looks right at ya. Right into your eyes. And the thing about a journalist is he's got lifeless eyes. Black eyes. Like a doll's eyes. When he comes at ya, he doesn't even seem to be livin'... 'til he bites ya, and those black eyes roll over white and then... ah then you hear that terrible high-pitched screamin'. The ocean turns red, and despite all your poundin' and your hollerin' those scribes come in and... they rip you to pieces."

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Birthday Mischief

I have a friend, recently graduated from high school, whose family is going through some tough economic times. Her folks are having trouble keeping the lights on these days so internet access is not currently in the budget, so I let her come over and use my spare computer all she wants, for Facebook updates and such. It's my beloved G4 Apple Cube and I'm delighted to see it back in action again as it's the most comely computer ever made.

Anyway, her birthday is Tuesday, the 31st, so if you'd like to give a nice young lady a badly needed thrill do me a personal favor and send her a quick "Happy Birthday, Candy!" email. Thanks in advance, everyone!

=Lefty=

Oh, That Mitt.

Mitt Romney has a wife, and she has a horse, and that horse is appearing in the Olympics in the dressage competition.

Now just imagine that your wife (or hubby) was in this situation. I would bet that you'd move heaven and earth to be there when your significant other takes the field.

Mitt? He could care less. In his own words:

“I have to tell you, this is Ann’s sport. I’m not even sure which day the sport goes on. She will get the chance to see it; I will not be watching the event. I hope her horse does well.”

Seriously, fuck this guy.

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Mitt says he want Sesame Street to start running advertising. NPR costs every American fifty cents per year, so I think that miserable corporate tool can look elsewhere to lop a few bucks off the deficit.

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A man goes crazy in Aurora, Colorado and kills 12 people. Mr. Romney's response is that there's no need for more gun control because Tim McVeigh blew up the Federal Building with fertilizer.

Double-fuck this guy.

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Oh, and, uhhhhh, have you seen the latest Newsweek cover? (Incidentally, Mitt is no wimp. He's an entitled wuss, a carpetbagger, and a pompous twit, but he's not a wimp.)

An exclusive Raging Pencils bumper-sticker! Get yours now at zazzle.com

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President Obama's Top 50 Accomplishments

Number 22: Created Conditions to Begin Closing Dirtiest Power Plants

New EPA restrictions on mercury and toxic pollution, issued in December 2011, likely to lead to the closing of between sixty-eight and 231 of the nation’s oldest and dirtiest coal-fired power plants. Estimated cost to utilities: at least $11 billion by 2016. Estimated health benefits: $59 billion to $140 billion. Will also significantly reduce carbon emissions and, with other regulations, comprises what’s been called Obama’s “stealth climate policy.”

For the full list of his 50 finest achievements read the Washington Monthly story.

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And now our Chart of the Day: Romney Flip-Flop Chart



Larger version of the chart here.
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Republican Job Creation Update

7-30-2012: The House took last Friday, the 27th, off because it was SUCH a tough week accomplishing nothing.

For the full 2001-2012 list of Republican sloth please visit republicanjobcreation.com.

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Fox News Lies. Dump Fox News

Fox News just can't stop distorting the president's words. It's like... it's like it's their job or something.

Click here to help Drop Fox from your cable system.