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Those Animals!

romney's doghouseThe aftermath of Adam and Eve's eviction from the Garden of Eden, accoutered in a lovely hand-crafted animal-skin trousseau provided by the Mighty All-Father of Beverly Hills himself, must have been tumultuous for the remaining animals all safe and snug behind the cherubim-protected gates.

One minute they're all the best of pals, sharing a lunch of black bean burritos and a banana smoothie (Bananas! They fit right in your hand! Just like God planned!) and the next instant about ten percent of the critters get a funny look in their eyes and begin lining up the nearest available throats in their canine cross-hairs.

Yeah, no pension or anything for the herbivores, sort of like being taken over by Bain Capital. God made up for opening the slaughterhouse gates somewhat by introducing the Reproductive Option but I'm not sure getting one's freak on quite takes the sting out of suddenly being put on the menu and thereupon reduced to your components parts ... alive.

Biblically speaking, I'm not sure what the ensuing metazoan holocaust had to do with two rather unremarkable creatures noshing from the wrong metaphorical plant but it's a charming side of the fundamentalist myth that should be shared with one's children, oh, about the time they start sleeping alone. It will give them such pleasant dreams.



Notes, Notes, and More Notes.

Lies: Mitt Romney just described himself as a small business man. Surrrrrrrrre he was.

: Hey, let's all go get the cocaine and heroin in el Paso! (Oops! That phrase includes a few of the 374 words the U.S. government monitors. Dopey me.)

Science: Ancient civilizations may have collapsed due to climate change.

Heresy: Here's a picture of me from when I was very, very young.

Humor: “Liberty University teaches that the Earth is 5,000 years old, and dinosaur fossils washed up in Noah’s flood. This is a school you flunk out of when you get the answers right.” – Bill Maher


And now our Chart of the Day: Comparison of Small-Dollar Donors between Obama, Romney, and Paul.

small donor comparison chart

Much larger version  here.


Republican Job Creation Update

republican job creation5-30-2012: The House took an extra day off and so they'll be back in session on Wednesday, then they'll skip town on Friday. Oh, those poor, overworked babies.

For the full 2001-2012 list of Republican sloth please visit republicanjobcreation.com.


Fox News Lies. Dump Fox News

Fox News Lies! How does Fox News report the story of falling gas prices? By animating the title of the segment to show rising gas prices and screaming "GAS CRISIS!". That's our little liars.

Click here to help Drop Fox from your cable system.

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Today's Google Chow.

Sheep: Rock.

Lion: Paper.

Sheep: Crap!

Caption: After the fall of man the animals took the initiative to sort out the food chain. Some were better at it than others.

Overturn Citizens United