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Play God? Somebody Has To.

Conservative's are fiercely anti-abortion for no other reason than it self-cedes them ownership of this quite emotional issue, one they can reliably plow for votes every couple of years. Their simplistic argument, which is nowhere to be found in the Holy Bibble, is that God imbues each little zygote with an immutable soul immediately upon conception, and the destruction of this bit of undifferentiated tissue, the size of a period in this sentence, would be deemed sacrilegious enough to get you shot in the face in your own church.

(This moment of mayhem brought to you by the G.O.P., the makers  of Fox News!)

According to way-too-popular myth, back when Adam and Eve were the only two humans on Earth it was pretty easy for God to keep track of each little soul. If my math is correct, He could even take nine months off between each occurance of conception to go fishing or do a little housework.

Today, the human population is rapidly crossing the seven billion-member Rubicon and many of us are, as I write this, furiously swapping genetic material, no doubt accompanied by scented candles and the silken strains of Barry White. To say the least, fertilization is occurring at a frantic pace, leaving God in the position of spitting out souls with all the rapidity and grace of a Browning machine gun.

Picture if you will God with each and every mature womb on the planet in his heavenly crosshairs, just waiting for that tell-tale "Ding!" of viability so he can pop another cap in the bullseye of another uterus. Thousands of times a second.

Up until now you probably only thought Santa Claus was this fast and efficient. (You do believe in Santa, right? RIGHT?) You might as well if you fall for this "soul' con game.

Motherhood is a beautiful thing but this planet is long past the time it can afford to feed every conceivable mouth. Abortion is not birth control, it's life control.


g5 pro towerI earlier related the tale of Beloved Girlfriend's beloved Apple G5 Pro Tower biting the dust. The local Apple Store told us that they didn't stock its dead power supply any longer so good luck with that and there's the door.

As there was urgent computer-type business for BG to attend we opted for another used G5, just so there would be no software issues. (Her G5 uses Motorola processors and the new G5's use Intel. Things could have gotten ugly.)

Once we had the new computer up and running I hit the internet seeking replacement power supplies. I found a refurb for $65 and received it in time for surgery this past weekend. I knew what I had to do next and I was scared like a little bunny at the prospect.

Allow me to explain. Here's a picture of the inside of BG's dead G5. Do you see the power supply?

Of course you don't, because it's buried in the freaking base of the computer, the red-highlighted area, and I would have to yank the processors to get to it. Processors don't like to be moved and will sometimes commit hari-kiri just out of pure stubbornness.

Fortunately, with the help of some handy online how-to's, the disassembly went without a hitch. Then I reassembled everything and hit the on button....


I didn't even get the merest hint of the familiar Apple "bong". Just utter, shame-filled silence.

After a moment or two of self-pity I pulled the processors again and, lo and behold, a cable from the power supply looked suspiciously like it was interfering with the proper placement of the processor. So I lashed the cable securely into it's dank little corner, fastened everything back down and hit the power switch.


Yes, the G5 lives. I am a GOD!

Not the kind of god, of course, which creates civilizations purely for shits and giggles but at least the kind of god that deserves lots of oral sex cookies and milk.

I'm just sayin'.



john boehnerFebruary 10, 2011: "We're going to have a relentless focus on creating jobs." - John Boehner.

So far the list of Republican accomplishments for 2011 is:

(1) Attempted curtailing of abortion rights.
(2) Attempted defunding of Planned Parenthood.
(3) Attempted defunding of NPR.
(4) Investigating Muslims.
(5) Declaring English as America's Official Language.
(6) Reaffirming "In God We Trust".

Nope. No jobs here.

Still waiting, John.


Fox News Lies!And what lies is Fox News spewing lately? That Secretary of State Hilary Clinton is avoiding Fox News Sunday even though they "routinely have the highest ratings" among Sunday talk shows. In fact, they're dead last.

end rant

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Today's Google Chow.

God: Off you go, little soul. Time to be conceived.
Soul: Wow! This is so exciting! I hope my new parents are nice.
God: Oh, don't worry about that. You're scheduled to be aborted.
Soul: Aborted? A-are you sure
God: Of course I'm sure. I'm God, aren't I?
Soul: So, as God, you're sending me to die?
God: Yes.
Soul: For what purpose?
There is no purpose. It's just my divine will.
This is insane! Look, why not simply keep women who would opt for abortion from getting pregnant in the first place?
God: I could, but I don't. Be that as it may I'm the decider. Take it or leave it.
Soul: Okay! In that case, I quit! There's plenty of other places looking for an intelligent, hard-working soul.

Caption: And that's where atheist's come from.