A
quick mea culpa: Due to a brutal work schedule
the image in today's comic comes from an earlier Raging Pencils
cartoon. I hope you'll find it in your spleen to forgive me.
See you Friday with new artwork... I hope. =Mike=
----------
Don't Say I never Gave You Anything.
 I've
had a zillion-dollar idea kicking around in the back of my
head for awhile and I've decided it's time to share it with
anyone with the capability to make it work. I, after all,
am but a humble art boy.
Like any red-blooded
American art boy I enjoy the sport of basketball, but I've
come to really dislike the
brand
of
professional
'ball
as it's played here in the U.S. for three major reasons:
(1) Salaries and egos are way out of line.
(2) With so many players standing 7+ feet the current height
of the basket is a joke.
(3) How can
you have loyalty to a team if all your star players are
from Germany, France, China or even Kenya? Especially if
they leave after one year when they get a better offer.
So here's my idea: It's called Capital Basketball.
Each state
in the Union will have one basketball team headquartered
in its state capital.
Each team wil be comprised of 12 players and each player
must have been born in that particular state. (However, if
a
player has spent most of his life living in a different state
other
than his
birth-state he can apply to that team for a one-time exemption.
Do the math, this is not going to be a big problem.) This
means that you will now be literally rooting for
the "local
boys".
This also means no draft and all the macho nonsense involved.
You wanna play on a team? Get your shoes and bring your best
game to the try-outs.
All players will receive the same guaranteed base pay regardless
of ability, though veterans will receive yearly raises. Hefty
bonuses will be paid to players for higher-than-average free
throws,
steals
and assist percentages.
This rewards and encourages team-play.
What about larger states that could possibly afford a second
or third team? Easy. Each team will be required to play parts
of its regular schedule in other major cities around its
home state. Imagine Austin and Little Rock playing a week-long
series in Dallas, San Antonio, Houston and Fort Worth.
This will save energy and travel time as both teams could
take the same bus.
Yes, lesser-populated states are going to regularly get their
butts kicked, but when Pierre upsets Boston in the playoffs,
with
critical assists from that Thompson boy from across the
street and that ex-shoe salesman from Sioux City, it's gonna
be
BIG news
back
home for a long time to come.
Yes, indeedy!
=mike=
|
