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This Little Irritating Piggy

ingorwn toenailI have an ingrown toenail. I hate it not because of the throbbing discomfort and the occasional spurt of pus, but because it reminds me of my own mortality in the most minor way possible. Most people lapse into morose introspection after contracting a horrible disease or suffering a traumatic accident.

Me? Toenail.

I don't mean to infer that I'm contemplating snuffing it over an achy toe-bone. More like wallowing in self-pity because my polka-dancing is temporarily kiboshed. Oh, the agony.

Still, it's fascinating in its own peculiar way as I'm more in touch with my pedal extremities than ever before. I now know more about the structure of the big toenail than I ever thought possible, especially after excavating for a couple of hours with a cuticle scissors and a grapefruit spoon, excising stray bits of keratin, flesh, and the occasional dead squirrel.

It's all very unpleasant but it's my own fault, of course. Years of careless trimming resulted in the nail incrementally trespassing into forbidden space. Frankly, I don't even know why we need the darned thing. And how did the Romans or the early Americans trim their toenails? Did they even HAVE toenails back then, or are these Guglielmo Marconi's fault?

All I know is that from now on I'll be conforming to accepted normality by trimming straight across instead of carving the Big T into a more aesthetically pleasing canoe shape. The vast community of Polka Heads will thank me for it.

BTW, no cards or flowers. The Toe family asks that you instead send donations to the National Association of Federations.

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As for the cartoon:
I'm really not kidding here. The way the Right legislates against education, libraries, school lunches, Head Start, day care, maternity leave (In Norway mothers get a full year of maternity leave), you'd almost think they get some sort of perverse pleasure from it. Especially in light of the fact they seem to want to leave women with no option BUT to bear child after child.

To some, the portrait I've painted here may seem dark, but in my view it's not dark enough.

=Lefty=

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Oh, that Mitt.

big fat liarOn June 6th Mitt Romney said: "With America in crisis, with 23 million people out of work or stopped looking for work, he hasn't’t put forth a plan to get us working again. Now I know we’re getting close to an election so he’ll come out with one soon, but three and a half years later, we’re waiting."

Mitt has a point... if you disregard the stimulus, the auto bailout, TARP, and the American Jobs Act which the Republican led House has stonewalled because there's nothing that a Republican hates worse than a successful negro.

Mitt Romney is a liar. A big fat, liar. And thinks the rest of us are stupid, besides.

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And now our Chart of the Day: Media Consolidation: Illusion of Choice (Really, Pew Research? WTF?)

the illusion of choice

See the complete chart here.


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Republican Job Creation Update

republican job creation6-15-2012: The House is in recess until the 18th of June. And, before you ask, no jobs were created.

For the full 2001-2012 list of Republican sloth please visit republicanjobcreation.com.

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Fox News Lies. Dump Fox News

Fox News Lies! Mitt Romney isn't the only one that has trouble with doughnuts. Fox News Eric Bolling obfuscates George Bush's disastrous economy using pastry to denigrate Obama.


Click here to help Drop Fox from your cable system.


end rant

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Today's Google Chow.

Republican Child Porn.

GOP elephant One: Looky what I got. Pictures of toddlers without a stitch of health care.

GOP elephant Two: Check this out! An entire album of pre-teens having creationism repeatedly crammed down their throats.

GOP elephant Three: That's nothin'. These little kiddies will eat anything.... if their parents could food stamps! Har-har-har!.






Overturn Citizens United