O
Yuletide Tree, O Yuletide Tree...
 The
custom of chopping down innocent evergreen trees and plunking
them in our living rooms
originates
from a time long before we made up a bunch of myths about a guy
named Jesus. Many
ancient societies ritually employed branches or, in fact, whole
evergreen trees to celebrate the winter solstice. A plant that
didn't die in winter must have certainly seemed magical to our
ancient forebears.
The German people began using evergreen trees in celebration
of the Christmastime around the mid-1500s, about the time Martin
Luther thought to famously decorate them with candles. The tradition
of the Christmas tree was brought to America
in the early 1600s but the Puritans punished those they caught
dabbling in such pagan traditions. Laws against such decorations
remained on the books until the 1800s.
Christmas trees finally became fashionable when Queen Victoria
and her family were illustrated standing around their tree in
1846. Not
only did every proper English home suddenly need a tree but the
custom quickly spread to the fashion-conscious east coast of
the
Americas.
When you think about it we could just as easily have a Christmas
rock or a Christmas bucket full of Christmas fish in our living
rooms to help take our minds off the ever-shortening days. But
trees aren't so bad. At least they don't catch fire and kill
us in our sleep as often as they used to.
Praise Jebus!
--------------
You know what the greatest waste of money of
all time is aside from Mitt Romney's campaign ads? Ads for The
Hobbit movie. That's because anyone
who plans on seeing it already had the date tattooed onto their
corneas months ago.
----------------
 Every
day in this country young adults are forced
into the streets with
no place
to go
and little
to eat. Luckily for them there's places like Covenant
House. It
not only meets the immediate needs of homeless kids
but
also helps guide them to a self-sufficient future.
So if
you have a few bucks left over after buying Aunt Thelma
that new snood please consider making a small holiday
donation to this worthy organization.
Thanks!
----------------
Uncle Lefty's Saturnalian Shopping Tips
Looking for that special example of
commercial excess to impress the jaded kin on your
Xmas list? Well, howzabout
one of these?
 Testicle
Self-Exam Model
I briefly considered purposely aggravating
everyone and making this another Mystery Item but it's
just
TOO
MUCH FUN
to say "testicle
self-exam" in front of a mixed audience.
And if you think that's in questionable
taste, you should read
the comments about this thing
on amazon. You might imagine it's nothing but a parade
of puns on the word "nuts", but you'd be wrong, pilgrim.
So, anyway, they make these.
Three guesses what that little pink thing is. (Go on
guess!) The description states that it
can be washed with soap and water but I nervously
ponder what
you might do to actually get it dirty.
Anyway, greatest gift for your grandmother EVER. Just
don't tell her what it is.
=Lefty=
Republican Job Creation Update
 11-30-12: The
House passed H.R. 6429, "To amend the Immigration
and Nationality Act to promote innovation, investment,
and research in the United States, to eliminate the diversity
immigrant program, and for other purposes." No jobs were created.
For the full list of Republican
sloth please visit republicanjobcreation.com.
----------------
Today's Chart of the Day: Percentage of GDP assumed by
total Medicare Spending
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