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Raging Pencils by Mike "LSMFT" Stanfill

war on drugs

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Raging Pencils is a minor personal conceit of:

Mike Stanfill, Private Hand
Mike Stanfill, Private Hand
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start rant

Awww, Shoot!

"My final point about alcohol, about drugs, about pornography; what business is it of yours what I do, read, buy, see, fuck or take into my body as long as I don't harm another human being whilst on this planet? And for those of you having a little moral dilemma on how to answer this, I'll answer for you. None of your fucking business! Take that to the bank, cash it and take it on a vacation outta my fucking life." - Bill Hicks

fuck cigarettesLong Story Short: If you think the war on drugs is about drugs, then you're on drugs.

Prediction: Some day, on a cable channel, probably one owned by Rupert Murdoch, there will be a program called "Buncha Shit". It will be an hour of stories, quips, humorous asides, anecdotes and snappy rejoiners concerning shit.

It will receive an Emmy for best comedy presentation.

At that point all media will cease to function as this program will officially denote the point at which popular culture hit rock bottom. Mankind will suddenly rediscover clog dancing and all wars will end as everybody will be too tired afterwards to do anything else.

Yeah, I know. Whatta buncha shit.

In case you haven't given it much thought, it's time to end this senseless war on drugs. We lost, folks. Even though we threw trillions of dollars at the so-called problem marijuana is currently the number one cash crop in America. Also, the Bill of Rights has been reduced to tatters since this nonsense began as a means of making drug arrests easier, but all it's done is turn this country into a virtual police state as the cops literally now have the power to do whatever they choose under the guise of intervention.

Look, our precious children are going to smoke pot and they're going to drink alcohol and they're going to smoke cigarettes no matter what we do. If we're serious about slowing down the levels of addiction in this country we have to look at the problem realistically.

First, outlaw all commercials for alcohol. You can still buy and drink what ever you like but let's cut out all this massive and expensive psychological warfare aggrandizing yeast poop. And tax that shit to death! Let's take advantage of alcoholics the same way we do cigarette smokers. Let's apply the taxes to teacher pay.

Second, quit devoting zillion of column inches in gossip magazines for the bravery that celebrities have shown in giving up alcohol/heroin/meth/Nyquil for the fifth time.

Finally, once they're of legal age let people use all the drugs they want. But while they're young, drive your kids through the bowery every now and again and show them the effects of being chemically stupid. I'm sure the glamorous reek of urine and the sensuality of missing teeth may give your kids a clue that, uh-oh, perhaps accountancy really isn't that bad.

I guarantee you, we'll still have the same addiction rate as before but you'll never read another story about about police errently knocking down some old lady's door at 3AM and shooting her to death because she was too old and too deaf to understand what was happening.

PS, if you're really interested in shielding your young 'uns from drugs and alcohol, move to Iran.


end rant

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obama  and mccain
What's wrong with this picture?
Barack Obama is 6' 2" tall.

John McCain 5' 7" tall.
All of the photo's from the Saddleback debate are like this.
I'd love to see what McCain is standing on.
Senator McCain is very vain about his relative shortness and rarely allows photographs from above his shoulders.
Incidentally, McCain is giving the audience that goofy "Gotcha!" finger-pointing thing because he cannot physically lift his arms over his head.

Today's Google Chow.
Mary Jane and little JJ hated it when grandpa Herb began reminiscing about the war on drugs.