Xmas
in July
 I celebrated
Xmas this past weekend. There's a reason for
that.
Y'see, the Stanfill family is a massive one,
a result of my dear old Dad's unyielding passion
for
dear old Mom. They, in fact, popped out eight
kids over an impressively short period of about
twelve
years.
I do not recommend you try this. The dental
bills alone will kill ya.
The sibs eventually all left
the nest but, regardless of where we settled
down, come
Xmas
Day we'd all navigate back to Mother's
house and have a rollicking time exchanging crappy
gifts.
Then we kids all started building families of
our own, some which now boast grandkids,
and we quickly
discovered
that making the Big Haul to Mom's house on Xmas
Day was quickly becoming a Big Fat Chore.
So now we meet the week before Xmas, and it's
great! No long lines at the airports, the liquor
stores are all open and we can run to the mall
for a quick gift if an unexpected relative shows
up.
It's such a good idea that I think everyone should do it,
if for no other reason than it would eventually fatally undermine
Xmas itself. You see, first we'll all celebrate
it a week earlier, then subsequent generations will push that
date back a week, too. Given enough time we could spread
Xmas
all over
the calendar.
It's at this point I should remind everyone that Jesus was
not born late December but in the spring. It
was the Catholic Church's need to usurp a perfectly good
pagan Saturnalia that led them to fudge the birth certificate
a
little. And in Australia it's currently the middle of summer.
So if you're really a good Xtian you should really
celebrate Xmas
in April anyway. Please do, in fact.
The rest of you? Pick your own day to celebrate Xmas and go for it. If religion
can
make
up
its own rules then so can you.
-------------------
I'd like to take this opportunity
to thank everyone who's heeded my pleas to support
their
local food banks.
And for those who yet waver on this issue there's still time to feed a hungry
family. So take a moment to head over to Feeding
America and let them help you
help others.
And thanks.
=Lefty=
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